Best Movie Ever

What is the best movie ever?

The Godfather? No.

Citizen Cane? No.

No no no, wrong country.

The answer is Spirited Killer 3.

Yes, the link is to a trilogy. The movie itself is so damned obscure that it has no profile for itself that I can find. Also, don't get excited at the shot of Tony Jaa on the cover. He was in the first movie for about 10 minutes and the Spirited Killer movies were released in America after Ong Bak so they decided to capitalize.

Why? Why is this movie the best movie ever?

Because in history of movies that are so bad that they are awesome, this is by far the most entertaining.

As far as story goes, it is pretty basic "mystical martial arts" fare. Ghosts, demons, magical animals, etc etc etc. A group of Chinese, Japanese, and Thai magicians go into a Thai forest to find an egg of a black crane (I could be wrong about it being a crane). They do, and before they can extract the ultra super powerful magic out of it, they are interrupted by an unnamed demon, played by writer and directer of the movies, Panna Rittikrai. He kills a couple of the people and the rest run away. He then does some kind of ritual amongst a bunch of bones that blows up the black egg and he disappears.

20 years later, a group of Japanese people and a group of Chinese people (separately) come to Thailand to get the egg. The villagers don't like what they are doing and decided to get the egg first.

Some idiot finds the site of the ritual 20 years prior and decided to piss on a skull. This wakes up the demon and he decided "ALL THESE FUCKERS MUST DIE!" He doesn't say that, but that's the idea. He summons 3 other demons; a skinny guy in blue robes, a psychobitch in red robes, and a ninja in black. The 3 lesser demons start attacking the villagers. Turns out the lesser demons can summon a 4th lesser demon, a ninja clad in white.

Sometime during a fight, the first demon summons another demon who is a man dressed only in a diaper-ish thing...for some reason.

There's more fighting, the daughter of the original Thai magician gets the power of everyone sucked into her and she just starts blowing the bad guys up.

That's the movie. Done.

Doesn't sound that great, does it?

Fuck you, it's amazing. From the very beginning the acting is hilarious. Not Oscar worthy, but all the actors seem to realize thankfully that they are in a campy martial arts movie about demons and ninjas. From distorted faces to silly body movements, it's easy to tell this movie is not serious.

But the reason it is so amazing is the small things, like the name of the last demon to be summoned.

I AM NOT AT ALL MAKING THIS UP, IT SAYS THIS IN THE OFFICIAL MOVIE DUB

The Ass Demon!

THE ASS DEMON!

Shit just got real! I lost it when he appeared. I can't help but love this movie now.

But there's more!

The white ninja says "NIN NIN NIN NIN NIN NIN" whenever he does anything. Trust me when I say it is a lot funnier than it sounds.

There is a fight scene where some of the combatants get lazy and lay down to fight or even fall asleep. Again, funnier than it sounds.

The best part of the movie though, is this little old lady you see at the beginning of the movie stalking through town. When we first saw her, we declared "look at sexy grandma, strutting her stuff!" Indeed, she was throwing her hips side to side like a saucy 20-something.

Later on, she gets possessed and starts killing people. However, the entire time her face makes it look like she is trying to seduce people, not kill them. The last stretch of the movie with her in it is one of the funniest things I ever seen because of her.



Critically now, it is a pretty bad movie. The fights can be impressively choreographed but it got to a point where I could accurately call out when someone would do a kick. It either became that predictable, or I am just awesome.

The acting is understandably silly. Sometimes it works (sexy grandma!) sometimes it doesn't. Some characters are just there to be there. One in particular is played by the cutey in Ong Bak. I am pretty sure her role in the movie came down to "look cute, get knocked down." Other than that, when she is in frame, she is just kinda there.

The music is a surprise. We watched Spirited Killer 2 before this (of course) and were surprised to hear covers of The Final Countdown and Cliffs Of Dover in it. Spirited Killer 3 uses Cliffs of Dover about 6 times. No Final Countdown unfortunately, but they did use a cover of Jungle Love a few times. Also, I am pretty sure they used Love Is A Battlefield once or twice.

That said, the music never matched the movie.

Overall, everyone should watch this movie once just to see how horrible movies can be amazing.










ASS DEMON!